Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Welcome Back, Me!

Welcome Back Me!
Take 2
Second Attempt to make a new blog post - lol!
Well, it seems that there are a lot of new things about Blogger that I don't know about in the intervening years since I last posted.  I am going to try this post again and see how it goes.
Well, the years have been exciting.  The years have been trying.  I have been living the old Chinese Curse:
May you live in interesting times
Living in interesting times is not a completely bad thing.  There are always new things a-happenin'.  There are always new stories to tell.  Most important, living in interesting times tests my adaptability and my response to the world around me.  I live in interesting times.  I am adapting.  I am evolving as a person.  I am growing.
Things could be worse.
Those of you closest to me know that I lost my Mother last November.  It's official.  I'm an orphan. 
The loss of Mom turned out to be far more traumatic than I would have imagined.  But I will leave that post for another time.  Mom and I had a very difficult relationship.  I spoke to her doctor about a month after Mom passed.  We spoke at length about Mom's issues and what took her out.  We spoke about Mom in general.  We spoke about my guilt for allowing her to pass.  Her doctor's take on the whole thing?
Mom and I had a very difficult relationship.  Children of problematic parents often are racked with guilt after they pass.  I am not unusual.
Mom often complained about how I had abandoned her.  However, Dr. Davis knew that I hadn't.  In fact,  her take on it was that Mom had abandoned me.  She was exactly right.  Mom abandoned me when I was very young.  Mom continued to draw me in and then abandon me right to the end.  When it became clear that she was not going to survive the last round of hospitalization and she could still understand but not communicate anymore, I forgave her for everything she ever did to me.  I also told her that I hoped she could find it in her heart to forgive me for the things she felt I had done to her.  She gave me a look like she hated me, but I have no idea whether she meant it or it was just something that the continuing strokes caused.  My gut feeling was that she meant it, but it doesn't matter.  She was gone three days later, I had said what I needed to say, and although I would have liked to have come to some sort of conclusion to our relationship before she left, she was never capable of that and to expect things to be any different was to wish for pie-in-the-sky.
May you live in interesting times.
I am taking lots of beading classes.  My work has ascended far beyond the average beader and I am a designer now.  A designer who is starting to be noticed and responded to by the Bead Masters who I am starting to see more and more often. 
I have taken classes this year with:
and more... I just can't remember at the moment.
I also participated monthly at Creative Castle in the Bead Embroidery Independent Study Workshop.
I still have the following scheduled:
Sherri Sanchez - Mosaic Rock
Have I mentioned that I am excelling in beading and striving to learn as much as I can as fast as I can?
I live in interesting times.

Gabby broke her back being bucked off of her horse, Aladdin.  Just as she was ready to start competing seriously for the first time in many years.  She had never had a fall like this before, and although she is going to be just fine, I fear that the fall has unnerved her.  I am praying that she gets back to her horse quickly and there are still a couple of horse shows this year at the new location her trainer, Sandie Springer, just moved to.  We are now at Hansen Dam Equestrian Center - for three days - and I hope that the drama stops for us now and Gabby can get a new start.  She deserves a break, and not in her back.
I live in interesting times.
Life is not bad.
More to come on another day.


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